Jumping into a river

A man jumped from a height of 100 feet, or 30 meters, into the Susquehanna River in Pennsylvania from the Wrightsville-Columbia Bridge. All the bones in his body didn't shatter on impact with the water; in fact, he survived. He suffered the indignity of being fished out by a person who was fishing for something else nearby, and ended up with pain in his head and neck for his troubles.

Mass suicide for love

An Indian man and two women tried to commit suicide while taking their two children with them. They took a variety of pharmaceutical drugs and pesticides to end their lives. Unfortunately for the adults, they didn't die. Even more unfortunately for one of the children, he died. At least the other child survived by spitting out the nasty tasting substances.

Now the parents will have to face the fact that they killed their own child. And it's doubtful that the other woman, who the man was having an affair with, will be able to stay with the man. Having the other woman elope to the husband and wife seems to have been the better option. If the wife was willing to commit suicide with the husband and the other woman, she would have been able to tolerate living with the other woman ...

Coverage of Britney Spears suicide attempts

It might be just me, but the media seems to be paying way too much attention to a claim that Britney Spears attempted suicide twice. Regardless of whether it's true or not, it seems to be occupying a disproportionate portion of suicide attempt news. Can't they leave the poor woman alone?

And now I'm feeling guilty that I might be adding to the brouhaha ...

Fumes in a hotel

In what should have been a private affair, a man created toxic fumes that caused a public spectacle, where a partial evacuation had to be made of the hotel he was staying in. He mixed household chemicals to create the fumes, which not only put his own life at risk but also those of others who were also staying at the hotel. It didn't work, and his attempt got into the news. The only silver lining is that he's not facing criminal charges.

Decriminalizing suicide in India

Like many other countries, India currently treats suicide attempts as a crime, where a sentence of up to a year in prison can be imposed. They are now considering whether to decriminalize suicide attempts and treat survivors as mental health patients. I would say that this would be a step in the right direction, since instead of giving further incentive to commit suicide by giving people a criminal record without treating the underlying motives, they would at least be trying to fix whatever is causing someone to commit suicide.

Hanging in jail

A murder suspect tried to hang himself in full view of a surveillance camera. Being under the watchful eyes of the guards, it's hard to see how he expected anything else than two minutes of agony while he suffocated. If he's innocent, then he tried to lose his chance at proving it and went through extreme pain for nothing. If he's guilty, then he tried a rather painful and unlikely to succeed way to escape.

Mother stabbing children

A mother stabbed her two children and then herself, but failed to kill anyone. They are as of yet in critical condition in the hospital, although the mother is obviously in a different one from the children.

She will probably never be allowed to be with her children again, and she'll have to live with the guilt of what she'd done for the rest of her life. What is it with some mothers who want to take their children's lives along with their own?

Drunken crash

Just after three days after a man tried to kill himself in a crash, two men crashed their car in the same canyon. Despite rolling over and ending up upside down after running off the road, the two men survived. When they were being rescued, they slashed themselves with glass shards and flung blood at the rescue workers exclaiming that they wanted to die.

If this was not a spur of the moment action by two drunken men, then shame on them for being copycats. They could have least tried out something slightly original instead of trying the same failed plan that someone else also tried just a few days ago. And they should have slashed themselves before crashing, not after. There's another black mark for them for acting horribly against the rescue workers that were trying to help them. The workers were people trying to help, so it behooved the two men to respect the workers, even if they didn't have to actively cooperate.

If they were just acting drunk, then shame on them for being disrespectful to everyone who decides to commit suicide after serious consideration. One should not try to take one's own life on a whim.

After their crash, they now have a wrecked car, multiple injuries along their body, and probably a prolonged stay with police officers or mental health professionals. They probably won't be able to try another stunt for awhile.

Jumping off the Grand Island Bridge

A man jumped off the South Grand Island Bridge in New York State and fell through a height of 80 feet, or 25 meters for the civilized person. Contrary to expectations, he survived relatively intact. Except for a broken leg. And massive injuries to the face, which will probably remain with him for the rest of his life.

Crash and drown

A man in Utah crashed his car and tried to drown himself. When medics tried to help him after the crash, they found him with multiple stab wounds, and the man ran away to a nearby creek to drown himself. Despite all that, he survived and was taken to a nearby hospital. After suffering the pain of stabbing himself, the shock from a car crash, and the suffocating feeling you get during drowning, he still failed in killing himself and suffered all that pain for nothing. The grilling he'll probably get from the police won't be pleasant, either.

Not dying alone with gas

A woman tried to kill both herself and her husband by asphyxiating themselves by gas. It didn't work, and now she may have to serve time in prison for trying to take her husband with her. As always, a big thumbs down for trying to kill someone besides herself.

Texting while taking pills

When you're trying to kill yourself, sending text messages after swallowing a bunch of sleeping pills is a recipe for failure. Most people have the decent instinct to help others survive, so it's no surprise the correspondent of the text messages managed to get an ambulance to the prospective suicide victim. Not only that, but it's likely that the pills wouldn't have done their job anyways, and there is the possibility of organ damage.

Jumping at the airport

A Puerto Rican man jumped off the upper level of a parking garage at Fort Lauderdale-Hollywood International Airport in Florida. Contrary to expectations, however, he survived the fall when he landed on a bus and rolled to the ground. He didn't even manage to fall into a coma. After his injuries from the fall are healed somewhat, he will then probably be incarcerated in a mental facility for awhile, and he may even have to recompense the damage done to the bus after he gets out.

Pill escape

Attempting to kill oneself by overdosing on pills is likely to fail. If you swallow a whole bunch of sleeping pills, then you won't be falling into a deep sleep that you will never wake up from. Instead, you'll start having trouble breathing and feel like throwing up for quite awhile. If you're lucky, you'll survive the experience without any harm to your physical health. If you're unlucky, you'll end up with liver or brain damage for the rest of your life.

It's rather unlikely you'll end up dead with many over-the-counter pills, although certain drugs are more likely to get you killed extremely painfully over a prolonged period due to liver damage. And there's no guarantee that you'll end up dead instead of ending up in searing pain throughout your entire body for the rest of your life.